Sex Vs. Making Love; a Faithful Marriage Liberty.
Thoughts on Two Becoming One
WARNING: mature theme. Proceed with proper conscience.
I want to speak honestly about building marriage in one of the categories of our commitment. And how the world distorts what is good, especially in relationships. But we ought not let the world misguide us into sexual malfunction. My perspective is shaped by having lived apart from those values, the ones who are upright, in the past. My foolishness led to many woes. But wisdom caught up to me, though very little I have.
These kids out there today have a whole bunch of sex. Sex everywhere. We grew up having sex like breathing air. But we miss out on the true blessing of making love within an experienced and healthy marriage. Yes, sex is pleasurable, and if your health permits it, have as much of it as you can, in the confines of holy matrimony. Hide here. Hide there. Sneak here. Sneak there. But making love is a profound bonding. It exceeds having sex. It surpasses expectations. It may fumble at first and find awkward emotions, but with practice, it can be mastered. Yes, sex and making love are two different departments. Though sex serves its purpose. With sex, you seek immediate climax upon outward lust. It takes a different approach and reaches a different conclusion. But making love is intimate, romantic, passionate, building a path of personal connection leading to its most blessed peak. Its rhythm is different. It's organized with flowers, music, dimmed lights, luring aromas, and proper ambiance. Love has a soft and slow touch. While sex is quick and to the point.
My wife and I share one regret. If only we could have been pure when we got married. If only we'd have been faithful Christians when we met. But that said, even if most couples, like us, did not keep themselves pure for marriage, they can still seek that love, for that is a unique gem of togetherness. And it should be practiced often. It is a cure for many disagreements. A remedy for a stressed soul. Talking doesn’t always take the form of words. It can take the form of two becoming one. Learn to kiss again. Knowing each other’s bodies and desires. Full trust and commitment. Loyalty and fulfilment. Vulnerable and welcoming. There is no stronger moment.
Husbands, spend time and effort with your wives. Wives, do the same. We wear many hats, but being a spouse is our top priority.
My wife and I purposely take quarterly outings together. We sacrifice and save for those moments. And though we are thankful to God for the many responsibilities we have throughout the days. We eagerly anticipate our independent moments as one. We return to our youth and remember our growing love for one another. There are many permissible freedoms in Christ: remaining morally upright and finding joy in our liberties to explore the deepest and most personal connections.
"Awake, O north wind, and come, O south! Blow upon my garden, that its spices may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden and eat its choice fruits."
Does this make sense to you? Is this not reasonable? To each his own context, no doubt. But I think if we seek to raise our children to honour marriage, they ought to understand the blessings that come with it.
Thank you for your kind attention.
Your servant,
SM
